Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Earworm: Wannabe

I'm stretching here. My mind is completely blank and I had to concentrate really hard to get something, anything to pop into my head that was worth writing about. I'm a trooper though, and I have to keep this up for my millions of adoring fans. Motivation is hard to come at the moment.

Finally, something pops into my head. First it is just a glimmer, then a little more, then zig-a-zig-ahh, it's the Spice Girls. "Wannabe" blasted from every dorm room during my sophomore year of college, and it drove me nuts. Why the guys in the hall couldn't just have the TV muted was beyond me. So it scratched at my door, begging me to let it in. I fought its advances, but five attractive women singing about how if a guy wanted to sleep with one of them, he had to take them all on at once? That was too much pressure. I finally relented, looking forward to each video with baited breath. I was just a part of the mindless masses, and it killed me a little inside every day.

It seemed like it lasted forever, but Spicemania really only took a couple years to blow over. I guess red-blooded males all over the world finally realized that chorus wasn't actually about getting it on with all five at the same time, but that a lady wishes for a gentleman to seek approval from her cohorts in order to make headway in the courting process. If only they had said that from the beginning, a lot of ears would have been saved.

 

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